Anger can be defined as a normal human
emotion usually characterized by antagonism towards something or someone you
feel or think has done wrong to you. Anger could be a good thing because it
could be a motivating agent to help you find solutions to something you’re not
happy about. Mainly, anger could be dangerous if it is expressed excessively.
Anger like we earlier said; is a
normal human emotion that could involve a strong uncomfortable or hostile
response to what or who triggered the feeling. When a person feels his or her
boundaries are being violated, they tend to react in an angry manner. Anyone
experiencing anger will also experience certain physical conditions like
increased blood pressure, increased heart rate, increased adrenaline level
amongst others.
We are going to be looking at Anger
from the biblical perspectives though. The Bible teaches in Ephesians 4: 26-27 that “be angry and do not sin, do not let the sun
go down on your anger”. From the scripture we just read, we can see that
even God knows that we will get angry someday at some point in our lives, but
something else followed that confirmation of our normal emotion, God said “...and do not sin, do not let the sun go
down on your anger”, God knows that anger is a normal thing, but our
reaction when we get angry is solely our choice to make.
Anger expresses itself in different
formats – sarcasm, frustrations, depressions, aggressions, verbal and silent
cursing, hatred, pride, etc
Though, Anger is a normal feeling just
as love and happiness are, but it is not a gift from God. It is simply a device
of the devil to distract us from something great. The devil uses this device to
make us sin. It may interest you to know that God, Jesus Christ, Angels even
the Holy Spirit gets angry too. This reveals that we are truly created in God’s
image and likeness.
Let’s
quickly glance through some scriptures that prove what we just read.
God Gets Angry Too:
Exodus 20: 4-5 – “you shall not
make for yourself an idol or any likeness (from manifestation) of what is in
Heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the water under the earth [as an
object to worship]. You shall not worship them nor serve them; for I, the Lord
your God, am a jealous (impassioned) God [demanding what is rightfully and
uniquely mine], visiting the iniquity (sin, guilt) of the fathers on the
children, to the third and fourth generations of those who hate me”
1 kings 11: 9-11 – “the Lord
became angry with Solomon because his heart had turned away from the Lord, the
God of Israel. The Lord appeared to him twice and commanded him not to follow
other gods. But he did not obey the Lord’s command. Therefore, the Lord said to
Solomon, ‘since this has been your choice and you have kept neither my covenant
not the statutes I commanded you, I will tear the kingdom from you and give it
to your servant”.
Psalm 78:59 – “when God heard
this, He was enraged and utterly rejected Israel”.
Psalm 7:11 – “A righteous
judge is God, His anger ever awaiting those who refuse to repent”.
Exodus 4:14 – “at this, the
Lord became angry with Moses and said, ‘Haven’t you Aaron, your brother, the
Levite? I know he speaks well. Look! He is coming to meet you”.
But, God gets angry each time a person
or a nation goes against his initial plan for creation.
Jesus Christ Gets
Angry Too:
Matthew 21:12 & Mark 11:
15-18 – “So Jesus went
into the Temple and drove out all who were buying and selling in the Temple
area. He overturned the tables of the money changers, and the stools of those
who sold pigeons”.
Mark 3:5 – “Then Jesus
looked around at them with anger, grieved at their hardness of heart…”
Jesus Christ gets angry for the right
reasons. His anger did not rise as a result of lame arguments or from selfish
reasons. His anger had focus – injustice. Besides, Jesus Christ never lost
control to anger. He mastered the art of mastery. And his anger had proper
results.
Angels Get Angry Too:
Revelations 12: 7-8 – “war broke out
in Heaven with Michael and his angels battling with the dragon. The dragon
fought back with the angels, but were defeated and lost their place in Heaven”.
Exodus 23:21 – “be on your
guard in His presence and listen to Him; do not rebel against the angel of the
Lord, for He will not pardon your wrongdoing, because my name is in Him”.
When the Angels get angry, especially,
Archangel Michael, it motivates Him fight evil.
The Holy Spirit Gets
Angry Too:
Ephesians 4: 30-31 – “Do not sadden
the Holy Spirit of God with which you were marked for the day of salvation. Do
away with quarrelling, rage, anger, insults and every kind of malice”.
The Holy Spirit gets angered when we
speak ill and abusive words. The Bible tells us not to grieve the Holy Spirit
in us.
NB:
Do not be quickly
angered in your spirit, for anger lies in the bosom of fools (Ecclesiastes
7:9)…
Before you get angry unnecessarily,
make sure that you’ve cross-checked the outcome and you’re okay with it, make
sure you THINK about it properly
before you act. Let us quickly look at an acronym that will help us to control
and manage “ANGER”. The acronym; T-H-I-N-K.
T – is it TRUTHFUL
H – is it HELPFUL
I – is it INSPIRING
N – is it NECESSARY
K – is it KIND
and KNOWLEDGEABLE
Forms Of Anger
Anger comes in two (2) different
forms, these are as follows:
1. Personal
Anger: This type of anger is stored up
inside. It is a kind of anger that is bottled up within a person. A person can
just get angry over a thing or a situation, and therefore the person would
start exhibiting series of violent acts. This form of anger births emotions like
jealousy, frustration, revenge, hatred, vendetta, low self-esteem, looking down
on other people, etc. There are times when people just get angry over nothing.
This kind of anger can cause serious health issues like high blood pressure,
heart related issues, e.t.c.
Some biblical scriptures that can help us overcome this form of
anger are listed below:
Colossians 3:8 – “Well then, reject them all: anger, fury,
slander, evil intentions, malice and let no abusive words be heard from your
lips”.
James 1:19-20 – “My beloved, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for
human anger does not bring about what is right before God”.
2. Anger that
is fueled by others: In this form, two
or more people are aggressively opposing against each other over an issue. Just
as the PERSONAL ANGER, this could also lead to physical brawl where bodily
harms and property destruction is inevitable.
We can control this by;
·
Learning to answer softly, sensitively and
carefully to people (Proverbs 15:1)
·
Learning to drop an issue before it leads into
a fight (Proverbs 17:14)
·
By thinking and acting in accordance to what
the Bible teaches (Romans 12:2)
·
By using our discretion (Proverb 19:11)
How To
Control Anger Before It Controls You
- Learn to overlook unfriendly situations: Be wise to a point where you begin to overlook certain situations in life. Like my mum will always tell me, “son, don’t collect water from every rainfall”; that proverb has stuck to me like a leech. It is not everything that happens around you that will warrant you releasing your anger upon. There are certain times when you just need to pick up offenses thrown at you and simply dump them in the trash bin of love and forgiveness.
- Identify and avoid your anger-triggers: By identifying things or people that gets you angry, you’ve moved a step closer to avoid being angry as you will do everything within your human reach to escape them. It’s impossible to avoid being angry, but you can decide on what makes you angry and how you will react to them.
- Learn to defer anger: One of my mentors, Pastor David Adeoye made this statement and my head exploded. To defer a thing is to postpone that thing to a later date. When you defer anger to a later date, you’d end up not doing what you planned on doing when that set date comes. For instance, if your spouse gets you angry over whatever issue, just defer the anger (postpone your reaction) to the next 2 weeks and occupy yourself with something productive till then. When the set date comes, you will realize that you will not be able to do what you initially wanted to do when you were angered. Anger is like fire, when you don’t fuel it in time, it loses its strength till it fades out.
- Avoid unnecessary arguments with hot tempered people: We all have different degrees of anger in us. So, it is better we rid ourselves of any discussion or argument that can lead to someone getting angry (especially you). Like we all know, evil communications corrupts good manners (Proverbs 22: 24-25). Avoid unhealthy arguments like a plague; they have a high tendency of getting you angry.
- Watch your words carefully before you speak: Words are like seeds, they grow inside the listener’s sub consciousness. Only speak words that will soothe and heal, not kill and destroy. You can never take back a word when you’ve already let it out, therefore learn to pick your words carefully before you speak out (Ephesians 4: 29 & Proverbs 15:1).
- Walk away from a hot scene: Walking away from a place where you sense the spirit of anger looming is not a sign of weakness but a pure sign of great wisdom. There are times when you feel anger building up within you, maybe when you are arguing with someone. The best thing to do is to gently walk away from that person or from that environment. Anger stirs up unpleasant problems that could have been simply avoided.
- Learn not to expect too much from people: Frustrations could come into someone as a result of being rejected or dejected by people. When you expect too much from people, you could end up being frustrated. Frustrations in turn, can grow into Anger if not managed and controlled early and properly. Be patient with people, be appreciative of what and who they are, realize that people have their minds and as such they cannot always be shaped into what we want them to be. Be accommodative and be real. Translate expectations into mere desires, especially when dealing with humans.
- Never hold grudges: Forgiveness is the key. There is no sin that is too much to be forgiven. We all go to God to ask for forgiveness on daily basis, but the only way we can obtain God’s forgiveness is when we as well, forgive others who have wronged us. It’s not just to forgive people’s shortcomings, it is also necessary we forget the shortcomings.
- Don’t dwell on faults: Some people are very good at reminding themselves of the incident or people who got them angry. That is simply an unproductive energy; instead use that energy to focus on things that will help you be more productive in your daily dealings.
- Never forget to ask God for help: No matter the situation we find ourselves in, we can always rely on the divine help of God. Constantly ask God to help you through any and every thing (Psalm 124:8).
Conclusion
Anger destroys destinies. Many people
have lost loved ones, jobs, meaningful relationships, and profitable
opportunities, all because of anger. So many people are also wasting their
youthful years languishing behind bars because of a crime they committed when
they were angry. That is why it is very important for us to learn to control
and manage that deadly venom in us called anger
before it destroys us completely.
When we learn to control anger, we have then
become wise, and when we become wise, we would be able to avert so many dangers
and mishaps. ANGER
is DANGER
without the “D”.
Points To Remember
- · Anger destroys destinies.
- · Many people have lost loved ones, jobs, meaningful relationships, and profitable opportunities, all because of anger.
- · When we learn to control anger, we have then become wise, and when we become wise, we would be able to avert so many dangers and mishaps.
- · When you expect too much from people, you could end up being frustrated. Frustrations in turn, can grow into Anger if not managed and controlled early and properly.
- · Walking away from a place where you sense the spirit of anger looming is not a sign of weakness but a pure sign of great wisdom.
- · When you defer anger to a later date, you’d end up not doing what you planned on doing when that set date comes.
- · Do not be quickly angered in your spirit, for anger lies in the bosom of fools.
- · God knows that anger is a normal thing, but our reaction when we get angry is solely our choice to make.
- · Human anger does not bring about what is right before God.
Prayer
Point:
Father, I thank you for your patience in my life. I (mention your name), this day, declare
that every form of anger, frustration, hatred, rage, wraith and resentments
that resides in me begin to find their way out of me. I declare that whatever
wasn’t planted by You in my life begin to lose their power over me. I hereby
forgive all those who have sinned against me and all those who have influenced
me to sin through these negative feelings. Let your love and peace rule in my
life and in all my doings. I ask these through Jesus Christ who died for the
salvation of the world. Amen.